Methods of Hiring

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Methods of Hiring

Post by naughtynick on Thu Apr 02, 2009 1:12 am

Methods of Hiring


Cognizant Method:


Hire a lion... ask him to stay for late nights but give him no work to do.
give him gobi 65 to eat again and again.
hire 100 more lions but do not increase the space to sit
give them same gobi 65 to eat
hire 200 more....... and more .......




TCS method:


Hire a lion
give him hell a lot of work and pay him government salary lion dies of hunger and frustration



IBM's metbod:


hire a lion, give him a pink slip in an hour... he dies of unemployment. ..




Syntel Method:


Hire a Cat ...
assure him that he will eventually become a Lion once he reaches onsite and make sure that he never reaches onsite.
Cat dies in hope of becoming a Lion....



MBT method:


hire the lion, make him take 14 tests and tell him that if he doesn't score 60% he will lose the job.
Lion dies of the strain?



i-Flex method:


Hire a lion???.oops cow, tell him he is a lion, send him in African safari for implementing flexcube in god forbidden territories, tell him if he comes alive he will get band movement (promotion) holy cow dies in fear of the real lion.



Polaris Method:


hire ..sorry....purchase a lion(COSL) ..
change his timings...(instead of 9 AM ...change it to 8:30 AM)
cut down his allowance (coupons etc)
lion dies from fear of becoming CAT.....



Patni method:


hire a lion, give him a salary of a cat...
the lion dies before joining....



Wipro Method:


Hire a Lion,
give him a mail Id.
he will die recieving stupid mails all day........! ! !!!



Accenture Method:


*Hire a lion.... **
Send him to chennai
Ask him to stay on bench for a long time
Ask him to eat idli,Dosa and Vada
No hindi, kannada or no other languages speaking ppl other than TAMIL...
No good food, No water..and specially No Beautiful girls
And say him "Go Ahead be a Tiger".
Lion dies in confusion he is Tiger or lion......

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Re: Methods of Hiring

Post by diez4u on Thu Apr 02, 2009 1:39 pm

hahahahhaa lolzzzzzzzzzz really gud one Razz Laughing
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Re: Methods of Hiring

Post by ll_aqib-rockerz_ll on Sun Apr 05, 2009 9:04 pm

NICE ONE BRO

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Re: Methods of Hiring

Post by mr.banker on Tue Apr 07, 2009 8:48 am

want to add one

killing of lion with bankers style.

hire a lion give him a work at its off time and let him free at on time. he will die with anger. Twisted Evil
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